Relationships Advent Calendar Day 22 . Give of Yourselves

I’m thinking you’re probably right in the middle of the Christmas whirl right now, school holidays, treats, parties, and all that wrapping ahead of you!! But don’t forget there are other ways to give at Christmas, and couples who are altruistic can often be more satisfied in their couple relationship, plus it’s an opportunity to spend time together, what’s to lose?!

So take some time out of your busy schedule, switch off the TV and talk with your sweetie about how you’d both like to give back in the coming year .. if time’s an issue but you’re cash rich how about setting up a monthly direct debit from your joint account to a charity you decide on together?

Or volunteer as a couple for a project, cleaning up your local beach or park, helping out with the National Trust (you can actually get free membership for being a volunteer) .. the possibilities are endless .. and you get to keep the warm Christmas glow for the whole year!!!

And for those of you yet to meet your sweetie, what a great opportunity to meet like-minded people!

What did you do, let me know in the Comments below, or tweet me!

advent2

Relationships Advent Calendar Day 21 . Turn up the Volume

Nothing brings back memories quite like music .. what’s ‘your’ song, what was playing on your first date? Your wedding? Your first Christmas as a family? For most of us there’s a special feeling associated with these tunes ..

So today your task is to find the song or songs that bring back these special memories and share with your sweetie .. have it playing when they walk in from work, call the local radio station and ask them to do a dedication, email a YouTube clip or post it on their Facebook wall .. or, if you have one, play it on your guitar, piano, kazoo etc the next time you see them ..

What did you do, let me know in the Comments below, or tweet me!

advent2

Relationships Advent Calendar Day 20 . Switch on your Relationship Radar

You’ve just spent 19 days doing something every day for the benefit of your relationship .. notice a difference yet? So now you’re a super honed relationship athlete in tip top condition it’s time to start looking for opportunities to flex those muscles ..

Keep your eyes and ears open for the many small opportunities that come up today to make a difference, and see how many you take .. send me your scores by commenting on this post, or on Twitter or Facebook if you prefer .. a relationship Christmas star for the winner!

advent

Relationships Advent Calendar Day 19 . Admit When You’re Wrong

This post follows on from yesterday’s, where I dared to suggest you just might be wrong sometimes (surely not!?) .. relationships thrive where both partners can give a little ground sometimes, and let’s face it, who doesn’t like to be right?

Today your task is to find something your sweetie is right about, give them a big beaming smile and let them know, with grace and love .. afterwards spend some time thinking about how easy or difficult it was to do that, and how your partner reacted .. what did you learn?

advent2

Relationships Advent Calendar Day 18 . Who’s in your Corner?

Christmas and New Year is a time for partying and family, and also a time for reflection and taking stock, making plans and starting afresh ..

Today take some time to think about which of your friends and family support you in your relationship, who listens to you without judgement when you need to talk, who refuses to take sides and who’s not afraid to tell you gently when you might just (gulp) be in the wrong .. cultivate these people and do your best to do the same for them in your turn in the coming year ..

It takes two to make love, but a whole community to keep the flame alive ..

advent

Relationships Advent Calendar Day 17 . Share Something New

It’s easy to assume your honey knows everything about you, but think about it, you go out and learn new stuff about yourself every day, you’re constantly changing and growing and there’s no way your partner could keep up .. so share something your honey doesn’t know about you today .. a new favourite food, or maybe somewhere you’d REALLY like to be kissed (behind your ears, between the sheets or maybe right on top of Grey’s Monument?) 😉

advent2

Relationships Advent Calendar Day 16 . High 5 Your Sweetie

Sometimes it’s tempting to take the good things for granted and only focus on the things your honey does wrong .. they know you love them right??

Wrong .. research shows that to feel positive in their relationship couples need an average ratio of 5 positive for every one negative interaction .. that means in order for your relationship to thrive you need to get working on those positives .. so notice your partner’s successes, and those of the two of you, and take time to celebrate them today ..

advent